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Causes of Sex Drive Differences in Couples


Written by Professor Kean, Updated on October 27th, 2022
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There are a lot of factors that come together to create a healthy relationship. Two people have to love and care about each other, and they have to share a lot in common. Even when everything between two people seems like it could be perfect, there are issues that lurk beneath the surface that can damage or even end a relationship. A healthy sex life plays an outsized role in a good relationship. Good sex can even sustain a bad relationship far past its logical end, but what happens when an otherwise happy couple can't connect in the bedroom?

A Healthy Relationship Depends on Harmony of Libido

Differences in libido can have a surprisingly powerful effect on a relationship. It doesn't matter how much two people have in common or how perfect of a couple others imagine them to be if there is just no spark between them. Furthermore, libido isn't always a constant. Relationships tend to cool off a bit over time, and that's okay! What's not okay is when two partners have differing levels of desire for one another or desire for sex in general.

Libido Imbalance Ends Relationships

While cheating is never okay, cheating is often the result of an unhappy sex life. If one person is constantly hungry for sex, and the other could care less, this will likely create a huge rift in the relationship. It's estimated that as many as four out of five couples struggle with mismatched libidos at regular points in their relationship. This sexual disharmony is one of the biggest reasons why couples go to a counselor.

Libido is About More Than Attraction

Sexual attraction and intimate connection are two obvious big factors for libido, but they aren't the only factors contributing to a healthy romantic flame. A healthy sex drive also depends on psychological and physiological factors that are beyond the scope of a relationship. Anxiety and poor self-image can douse libido, for example. It doesn't matter how much your partner wants you if you can't see yourself as worthy of want. Addiction to alcohol and opiates can also suppress romantic urges, as well as medications such as SSRIs.

How Your Hormones Affect Your Libido

As you get older, be aware of the influence that Hormone Imbalance may be having on your sex life. Both men and women require healthy levels of Testosterone to spark libido and achieve sexual satisfaction. While men make way more Testosterone than women, Testosterone is still integrally important to women's sexual function and desire, along with Estrogen. If a woman doesn't have hormone balance, she'll have trouble getting turned on or getting properly lubricated. Sex can even become painful. For men, Testosterone is the key to erectile function and makes sex possible.

Other hormones can negatively impact your Testosterone production. One reason why anxiety and stress eat away at sex drive is because these experiences lead to increased cortisol production, diverting resources away from sex hormone balance. Diabetes also leads to Low-T, as surging blood sugar and insulin levels suppress the body's production of Testosterone.

Don't Be Afraid to Turn to Outside Help to Revive Your Libido

If your previously happy relationship has reached a point of faltering desire, understand that all hope is not lost. It may not even have anything to do with your relationship! If you believe that your hormones may be getting in the way of your relationship, don't be afraid to reach out to a wellness clinic that specializes in Hormone Replacement Therapy. There are simple tests that can be performed to analyze your Hormone Balance and diagnose Low-T or other conditions that may be getting in the way of a happy sex life.

Men all over the country have successfully turned to Testosterone Therapy for Low Libido, and most have been happy with the results. Bio-Identical Testosterone may also help you gain muscle mass, overcome fatigue, feel better about yourself, and more! Whether it is counseling or HRT Intervention, don't languish in an under-sexed relationship; take the steps necessary to get back in the driver's seat of your sex life!

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